Witch List

It seems to me that peoples of yore were notoriously bad at making lists. With such an auspicious beginning as the Code of Hammurabi (which, frankly, isn't a very good list, but for a first try it does pretty well), you would think that humanity would pick up the summarizing torch and run with it. I mean, what did people do in the middle ages for fun, really? You can only pick scabs for so long before you die of infection or bleed to death. While waiting for the stupor of lead poisioning to wear off, why not come up with a "You might be a Saxon if.." list?

I bring this up because, for years, I've been trying to find a good list of the traits that well-meaning zealots looked for when trying to find witches to burn. Not that I would ever burn a witch, mind you. I know a witch who seems very nice. They're very colorful people and add to our lovely world culture. It's just that, like many people, I prefer to judge those around me as quickly as possible, and if they don't have any immediately distinguishing characteristics, I actually have to think about them. That leads to all kinds of unwanted empathy that I would prefer to avoid.

So, like I said, I'm looking for a way to identify those people that might have been pestered unto death with fire and rocks a few hundred years ago, and found this in "DeVrie's Pamphlet Omnibus" that reprints all known pamphlets and flyers from 1500 to 1800. Sometimes interesting, often boring, regularly incomprehensible, this bit was of note:

A Page Booke of Reckoning the Wicked-

Seek ye and ware those who

    Speak with a loose tongue
    Walk and wash linen in manners unknown to the village
    Cackle often and in all places
    Love the hated thing
    Deny their hideousness
    Dance with unseen partners
    Keep the head uncovered
    Maintain all queerness e'en when so exposed
    Sigh and mutter heretical maxims about housewares and berries

I'm not sure these points still hold in this day and age, but it's the best list of it's kind that I've found.

UPDATE: Strangely, I found a similar list on this blog.

Comments

[Gretchen]

Finally, confirmation that I am both sassy and a witch! It's a good day.

[Liz]

Hmmm...I wonder who's the supposedly nice witch...